yeah..i did..
and then i saw something i knew was happening..
yet i was just denying it wasnt happening..
i shouldnt have let it get over me..
it has been 4months..
of ignorance..of silence..
i thought i was strong enough..
but indeed i wasnt..
i had a terrible outpour last night..
i felt the wound.. the pain..all over again..
i should have listened to my long lost fren..
yet i went against it..
so..its time i suffer the pain..all ALONE..
i dont know how long i will survive this tormenting period..
i cant tell anyone about it..
i have to swallow the painful FACT that i have concluded..no matter how bitter or hard it is..
i just wish i dont have to go through it again..
i am not strong as everyone think i was..
i am not a happy cheerful gal like everyone think i was..
i am just hiding all the pain in me..
only GOD knows how i am pulling thru all the days im here..all alone..im loz..spiritually, mentally.. and wounded..
i hope the memories can be erased..and i just wont think of it anymore..
