a woman with value..

22nd June 2010..

today i met up with my 'special close fren'..

a person i've known for more than 7/8 years..

how he has changed over the years..

no doubt the journey he went through..

was something i wont be able to understand..

something i wont be able to feel..

coz..i am definitely NOT him..

but the 2 hours plus chat we had..

was indeed something i have to thank him for..

for being able to see i have lost my direction..

when i am not supposed to be..

for being able to challenge me..

for being able to dare me..

and most importantly..

for being able to see the inner me..

that i myself wasnt able to see..

thank you for making some sense in me..

i dont know what i am afraid of all this while..

i dont know what i am worried of..

i wasnt supposed to be lost..when the answer is so obvious..

i know what i should do..

but i just bloody hell dont have the guts to do it..

i thought i was brave enough to sense the changes..

i thought i was sensitive enough to know something need to be done..

yet it wasnt about me ONLY..

coz it involved two people to solve this..

it shouldnt even be a problem..

at least i know i did my best..

i aint gonna blame myself for anything now..

coz i REALLY did wat i could..

and i tried everything that i could..

it is the other person's lost..

yeah..indeed that person is too coward to face it..

and hence..no rights to say im not understanding..

from today onwards..

im gonna change..

to become a woman with value..

i aint gonna complain..

i aint gonna be childish..

i aint gonna let emo kill me..

i will gain back the respect that is due..

i will not let anyone anything to wound me that bad..

i will start loving MYSELF more than i should..

and i certainly gonna make a difference..

I WILL I MUST I SHOULD I NEED..

thanx to my dearest fren for being there and not giving up on me..

i love u for doing this.. THANK YOU SO MUCH..