painful memories...

it used to be the day..
i looked forward to..
for the few hours..
we wud be able to spend those precious time together..
yet..this year it wasnt a happy day..
not when u sent me a text that..
we shouldnt even text each other anymore..
so that it would be fair to both of us..
those words..were like a sharp knife..
stabbing right through my already wounded heart..
tearing up all the pain i was pulling through..
with tears streaming down endlessly..
yet i was glad that u are moving on..
at least GOD listens to my prayers..and tears..praying for u..

i used to think u would be there for me..
when i needed some words of comfort..
yet now i know..im all alone to pull through..
i used to think u would be listening to me..
if i needed just ur ears to listen..
yet now i know..im all alone when problems are suffocating me..
i used to think it would be ok..
yet now the heart ache is so much heavier..
especially when im now all alone...

i know u wont be reading this...
coz..u wont want to know anymore..
yet my heart doesnt  betray me..
i miss u so much..
yet i can only keep it to myself..
i miss all the time spent with u..
yet i can only rmbr them as memories..
i miss ur voice..ur comforting..loving voice..
yet i can only rmbr those words..
i miss ur ever strong supporting hug..
yet..i can only hug myself now..
i miss those nites spending just talking to u..
on the bed...by the sea side..
yet now..its only darkness..and loneliness by myside..
i miss those time eating with u..
yet now..its emptiness..meaningless meals i have..
til at times i skipped meals in order to safe the heartache..
i know i hav lost u..
in a way..im glad ur moving on..
i sincerely hope u will be blessed with someone who deserves ur love..ur care.. ur respect..
while i know..no one can replace u in my heart..in my life..
i will always love u.. i really do..