there's indeed a difference...

25th october 2009...
just when i thought of letting go...
something just prop up...
and made me stay..
it was a drastic thing i did..
something that i NEVER do previously..
i didnt know how i managed to do it..
thou it wasnt easy, yet a bit worrying as well..
but it was a move that made the other person..
realised my worth and importance..
so..it was a bit worth it..
but i promised i wont do it again..

being ignored and not bothered..
was something i felt all these while..
probably the other person wasnt aware..
until i did the same and hence the pain was felt..
it was then that my presence meant something..
the silence woke the other person..
suddenly my words hit the other person hard..
as i REALLY meant business and not joke anymore..

its bit funny thinking about it..
thou at that time my heart was smashed to pieces..
it was 'thoughtful' how the other person managed to use the 'trick'..
of making me NOT ONLY reply to the msg..
but also make a long expensive call to explain what need to be done..
as it was 'someone's life that we were talking about at that time'..
anyway, the msgs was actually to get me to reply..
was to make sure i stop ignoring..
as my weakness of caring for ppl betrayed me at last..
i cant bear to ignore that msg..
as i would be guilty for life if the fren really was not well..
but when i called..i knew it wasnt that serious..
it was meant to get my attention..
and to listen to my voice..
and to apologise with a few sentences of explanation..
it was nice to be able to tell things out..
and make clear of doubts and disappointments..


2 days have passed..
there's INDEED a difference..
which touches my heart..
which made me smile when im down..
a few lines of reassurance..
with a few lines of warmness..
with a few lines of caring words..
which i hope is true..
which i hope will carry me on..
which i hope will give me strength and support..
and prepare me to move to a new path ahead..